skalidis's reflections

Yesterday was at Esplanade to have dinner so smart me went around sitting and enjoying live performances and must have been really absorbed or whatever i just didn't realise my wallet was missing till when i was about to leave the Waterfront... frantic search to every place i was at failed to pop up any wallet... in the end resign to fate and made a lost report both at Esplanade and Police Station... so if anyone saw the below wallet picture that should be mine haha.. please return back to me hor... thanks!

Been donkey years since i last saw my very own blog... understand the spur of my neighbour i decided to add more spice to my blog with PICS!!!! which are so critical to magnifying everything i say....

Well here is my first go at picture uploading on my blog.


And this one is a neat collection of chinese comics bought during my poly days.. Boy would have completed most of it if not for having a relationship.. all my finances goes into it.

Been hooked onto doing something which i really should stop doing for sometime already. And there comes a time where i have to make a stand and be discipline.

That time has come. Should be doing things more seriously and have a goal in life (not that i do not have one just that procrastination has derailed my goals). I hope this abstinence im taking will last long enough.

Fresh bachelor grads apply IT Helpdesk as their first job. <---- who thinks there is something wrong with this? i do.

Was on MSN when a friend of mine told me Steve Irwin had died tragically while filming for a documentary. when i first heard it i thought he was kidding but upon searching on multiple news agency, i realise he was not pulling my leg.

Shock followed by sadness stepped in... Steve Irwin animal documentaries have always been a joy to watch albeit sometimes his programs tend to be extremely dramatic but that is just the way he is. To end his legacy the way he tragically died was somehow not as fitting as desired.

During my stay in Brisbane, Australia over 2yrs i asked the locals there what they felt bout Steve Irwin.. majority think he is alrite but felt that his programs all irritating due to his over-the-top dramatic commentaries he gives. But im sure even now the same group of people would send their condolences to him.

Anyway, feel sad for him is one thing but on the other hand we should take our hats off him for being able to do what he love best and at the same time educate humans on the truth of animals we thought are deadly and harmful. Perhaps it is abit ironic that he had to die while trying to proof that stingrays are somewhat harmless to humans... Sigh...

Im sure he will not regret the life he took.. Only hope his wife and two children will pick themselves up and carry on his legacy.. after all Steve Irwin took over from his Dad's Zoo and now hopefully one day Steve's son would do the same too.

Need a face lift after see the old journal.. and went thru all the themes that were available and finally after some tweaking, settled with the current one.

Kinda like this one.. and see how long i can go with it.

Pimple - How to get rid of it in 24hrs? Possible? Someone should invent it.

I wonder how is she? Is she doing well? Questions like this have always bothered me.. i wanna know how has she been doing but a hunch tells me she is definitely doing much better than me. After all these time, even though i know im at fault i still do love her alot but i know i cannot regret now. its just a decision in life i have to take whether it is right or wrong only time will tell.. but at this point in time, it does feel like a bad chose i made.

Call her? What do i say? Doubt i will ever call her.. cant face her no more the guilt is way too strong to handle... what gives me the right to call her after all the hurt i have caused??? Wish i had a crystal ball to just zoom in on her and see whats happening in her life right this moment.

Relationship can go wry quickly if you do not handle them properly as i have found out from my previous relationship.. and since then have kinda adopted a wait-n-see approach to relationship. it is actually good in the sense that i can take sometime out and do my own things but i feel i am a relationship junkie! The need to be with someone is exploding inside me. Hate the feeling of being alone, with loads of time on my hand... Damm! really need a job soon or this feeling is just gonna get worse.

Im sure almost everyone would have ask this question.. at least once in their life. And probably the answer is different of each individual person. But here i am again asking myself what is the meaning to my own life? Unfortunately the answer lies within myself.. sometimes i wish answer to questions like these appear in dictionaries or encyclopedia or only if i could just Google it.

This evening i have decided to start blogging once again (not like i was active previously) and hopefully this time i can stick to it longer.

Once again i hit with another crossroad in my journey to enlightenment.. this time its 'Job Seeking'. Graduated from QUT this July and now hunting for the right job. Not like i seek huge amount of salary or over demanding with list after list of conditions... all i want is a good start to a long and winding road to success. And that would be a reputable organisation or at least a company worthy to start my career from. my sis has done magnificently in her career and honestly i am really proud of her success and would one day hope to emulate her or at least be half as successful as her. Job seeking was never my forte (wonder whose forte is that??) but escaping is not an option, someday i still have to face it. Havent sent loads of resumes out yet and its been one month since i came back to Singapore and went to 0 interviews. Am i doing something wrong? God knows!

Since i came back.. havent done anything worthy of mention and that really sucks... always wanted to have a close knit of friends with roughly the same interest so we could all go and hang out together and chill out. Used to have.. but all are working and time has become a factor. Or really is it something else? Maybe if someone took the initiative to call... maybe that someone should be me? Nonetheless, each day passes by and humans greatest mistake - procrastination - happens to me yet again.....

Suppose to sleep early as usual but somehow i just do not feel like it... Just wanna hang loose.. have someone to talk to... have someone to supper with... sigh.. is this a sign of loneliness? that sucks!

Today I have shown this very very old, untouched, unseen and almost forgotten blog to my wabbit. And she as usual didnt believe it was my very own blog. How stunned she was to learn of the news! Heh.. Always loved the surprised look on her. Anyway update more if i got the time. till then.. hope the dust on this blog would be cleared.

Just read from the papers today.

Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston have officially been divorced after a four and half years of marriage. They have always been the golden couple in Hollywood and seem such a perfect pair, everyone hope they would last the mile. Alas, they had their disagreements and went their sepearate ways. Apparently, Mr Pitt was furious when Miss Aniston didnt wear their wedding ring on one occasion and also didnt mentioned his name when she won the Golden Globe Award, due to forgetfulness. Hmmm... wonder did events like this caused their constant quarrels. Some report the bigger issue was the fact that Mr Pitt wanted to have children whereas Miss Aniston would rather concentrate on her career. Who knows what exactly is the reason behind their separation.

Another news regarding another Jennifer.

It is said that Ben Affleck is seeing Jennifer Garner. Wow! First, he was with Jennifer Lopez now it is Jennifer Garner. Hmmm... Maybe Mr Affleck has a thing or two bout the name 'Jennifer'.

On the set of Alias, Miss Garner's ex-boyfriend's carpark lot was apparently taken by some car(belongs to Ben) and was furious and went storming into the set and confronted the owner. Mr Affleck apologised but didnt stop Miss Garner's ex to shout out "Dont ever park in my parking space again". Wow... Talk about jealousy.

By making that decision, I have made more than one person sad and caused more pain to anyone in my entire life. It is something which i thought i would never have done it nor even thought about it during the whole time with her. But i had to do it. I just had to. However sad and confusing it may seem, i still got to do it. Explaination in failed relationship always seem useless and pointless because it always does not seem to really answer our questions. Yet we always demand and require an explaination of such nature. At this point, my mind is filled with doubts and uncertainty but what i am sure of is the need to refocus my mind and life to prepare myself for the worst in the next phase of whatever my life may bring upon me. This is something which i hope she must also do no matter how tough it may seem. Because in life you can only look foward and each step back would only prolong the process of one's tough life.

Just ended 2 of 4 papers and sad to say i cant find a single paper whereby at the end of it i can safely say "Yes! I am confident bout this paper." Sigh... I guess DC really is something that is not easy to do even asked the lecturer and say this paper has always had high failure rate... Was thinking to myself "Then why do u still set so high standard again!!"

Anyways.. 2 down 2 to go and have bout 2 days to start cramping as much as possible again. Didnt slept much the pass few days for the other 2 paper but now managed to get sufficeint rest for one day and can start all over again the next few days.

Just hope i can pass everything and get on the next sem this whole exam thingy is getting me all stressed up and worried. Even studying for one paper half way i would start to worry bout the next one already. Here goes nothing!

Just when i thought i could sleep slightly longer this morn a subtle knock can be heard from across my room and within seconds a second knock now againt my door came. Thinking it could one of my housemate calling me to wake up for lunch i unwilling open my door to reveal its my neighbour D.

I was like so fucking pissed off but yet at the same time i probably have the face of someone who just woke up with eyes barely able to open fully and with a frown that can chase a dog away.

He asked "Eh Sunny ah do you know if anyone of you guys are using the washing machines? Because both of them have clothes in them."

I replied "Huh? Err.. Don't know not sure leh.."

He said "Oh.. Sorry to disturb ah... Just thought you might know.. okie thanx!" And he left

Went back to my room and suddenly this thought came over me.. "How did he get into the house?!?!"

Woke up early just to get my specs fixed. Well to be exact TRY to wake up early, set the alarm at 8am but woke up and off it to sleep till 10am. Sheesh... should really stop the bad habit of getting back to bed and laze around. Does get me in trouble many times already.

Was bout to go out with H when suddenly A open his door and asked where are we heading and wanted to join us too. So we waited another 10mins and then finally headed to City.

H brought me to this expensive looking shop rougly by the name of Lauber & Hauman or something like that. Only saw a lady inside and started telling her my problems and she took a quick look and said "Ah! Its only a minor problem. Will get it fixed." Off she went to the side with the working bench and started trying to screw back in the lens. Was so glad to hear that till i realised that she does not know her stuff well.

After awhile she came back and "Looks like its not as simple as we thought" haha... So she suggested that i let her mechanic drill a whole into the specs cause she thought that the screw had broken off into the specs and needed drilling to find a new hole. But right after she said that she mentioned that its entirely up to me to decide if i want to let them do it cause if they broke the specs it would not be their responsiblilty. And i still had to pay A$15 for the drilling and effort taken. I was like.. "What the F***!" Then i told her maybe its because the frame had been twisted and just require some re-twisting of the specs instead of such drastic measures. After which she took a second look and said "Oh.. hang on.. it seems to be okie..." And she went off to her working bench again and this time said maybe all it needs is a new screw.. So another 5mins passed and came back with the problem solved. She managed to get the lens fixed back. I was so happy!! Got back my specs... But after taking a closer look at it i realised that its only a temp solution as there is still a gap in it. She probably took a longer screw so it can reach the end of it. Well nonetherless, at least i have the specs again and wearing it.

The GOLD screw cost me A$3. Cant complain too much can i?

Today as usual is a hot day and read in the papers they say the weather is gonna be like this for a couple of days before a short rain fall might happen but was told it would only be a few days before it will be back to the hot and dry weather again. It seems summer is here early this time round.

Got up... Had lunch(instant noodles with eggs and SARDINES?!?!) Tasted horrible too, any-ho once the tummy is happy just ended lazing around the couch and watch the European Cup highlights which is really a rare program since they hardly show any soccer matches over here.

Everything was normal.. had a good dinner. H cooked his usual Indian Curry Lamb. Afterwhich i asked whoever wants to go the the Viet restaurant to have fried ice-cream. So me,H and J went along and just wanted to get some free air-con and nice cool ice-cream which wasnt as good as usual. Its funny to go there and see the usual waiter and normally we would have the famous Crispy Chicken Rice but this time instead we asked for the menu and for bout 5mins told him we just wanted 3 fried ice-cream. Haha...

Then after bout half an hour came back.. left spex on bed next thing i knew i fell asleep and had my spex twisted while playing ur game of Swimming in the wonderful mobile phone u borrowed. Now i am so pissed with myself that such a thing can happen to me. Fortunately, i brought my spare spex the ugly black army one that i used as a backup. Gonna see an Optimists in the City tomrrow... What a way the end the day really spoiled the whole evening...

As for today i officialy annouce that the wet and rainy past week have ended and welcome the hot and sunny Summer heat again. so much for Spring it only lasted like a few days. Went to watch Resident Evil: Acopolypse last nite with H because all the other guys backed out at the last min. Was a rather good show and bound to have a part 3 from the way the story ended.

Anyway today wanted to rest longer but the damm heat has made it unbearable to sleep any longer. Thus woke up all tired n sweaty.. took a shower(still on hot water). Today is groceries day so had to go WestEnd to get our stuff again... Once again B didnt join us for the buying session. Felt like leaving him out of the shopping haha...

But at nite B made it up with cooking us dinner.. this time he did a Chicken Rendang Special super spicy till now i have a bad tummmy.. these days shitted alot of times.. till bleeding sheeshe... Afterwhich we guys sat to watch Gladiator and switching between Kung Pow(super lame rip-off Hong Kong movie)

While i was out going to withdraw some cash at this ATM at Hougang with tomatojuice and kazuk i must have stepped on some dog shit but i didn’t realised it earlier.

So while at the ATM i was telling them that i could smell some stench and proudly identified that it could be either someone's puke or someone pet's shit. And then i go on saying what the puke could be eg: spaghetti or some food...

Until i was back in the car when the stench became so obvious i panic and asked everyone to check who the culprit is... After smelling my own sandals, i immediately left the car and tried to clean it off but it was no use...

Hate such shit to happen man!

Yes its the famous Bush everybody knows and yesterday was the first time he had visited us. And due to the fact that Air Force 1 decided to land at Paya Lebar Airbase, we gotta stay in-camp for 3 days and get all anxious. As usual security was beefed up and duties were evenly sorted out and so i was to look-out for VVIP vehicles entering base with my other shift mate. At first, both of us dreaded such duties since we are already in a ORD mood but we realise this is really an opportunity to actually catch a short glimpse of the No.1 man in US.

We had to wait till like 3hrs standing there doing nothing till those big shots arrived... kinda really a waste of time but they being VVIP so we had no choice. Got to catch a close up shot of DPM Lee and did the honour of saluting him twice.... but the big WHOO HA about this whole issue is the entourage of President Bush man... it was like a fricking long convoy of 4WD jeeps and vans and mini-buses and 3-4 limo and his very own super high limo. Plus local police force making the whole thing such a grand affair. Honestly it was really very impressive, you gotta see it yourself to actually feel it man.... Its exactly what u see on television those US Special Service Agents and they are HUGE!!

Of course some might say he is just another man whats the big deal..... To me is really an experience to be part of.

Yesterday my friend asked me and tomatojuice for coffee at Coffee Club - Siglap. Which kinda surprise me since he rarely does that. anyway tomatojuice could not make it due to unforseen circumstances.
My dear friend was asking me what i wanna do after my NS. And i said like wat most guys would do(i pressume) either find a job or further studies. Then he looks at me and say its sad that how ppl in spore are so typical abt how they want their life to be. And he blames it on the education system in spore that made us think in this way. He goes on to say that how we have become fearful of failures and thus not wanting to take risk.
Eg: How as a baby as long as we have to will to learn to walk nothing can stop us. But thru our education system we became afraid to fail and stop taking risk.

So i asked him how he wants his life to be. His motion in life is to enjoy and help as many ppl as possible. He defines enjoying life as doing whatever you want and accomplishing it. I told him that would mean u need millions of money. And that is how he wanna do, by age 35. I was thinking to myself that seem rather impossible.

Then he goes on saying how the world is actually is still being run like the Romans Age. That the majority are slaves working for their employers and how this majority of ppl are being exploited by the very few who controls them. Goes on saying why do u wanna be a slave when u can strike out early and be one of the very few. I told him that striking out have very big risk of failing. Then he would quote me the above mention idealogy.

I understand what he is trying to tell me but i would never take the risk of striking out. For me i would stick to a office job and work my way up the so-called typical life style. He says it would take me maybe 40 - 50 before i can actually enjoy life and by that time we would be too old to travel and do wat we desire. Maybe thats true... But if i fail at striking out i would be left with nothing and that it really disatrous. And he would saying that if you believe that u can do it no matter how hard you can still achieve what u want. I really hope so....

began the day by hoping nothing complicated would come our way at pass office. Even though changing of passes sounds like and seem easy, there are always a few weird people or cases that pop up.

Came early to camp, waited for my other shift mates to reach office and then head for breakfast (even though i already ate).

Talk abt condemning people at the office is a real sad reality. One of my shift mates apparently because of his working attitude, everyone else dislike him (sounds childish i know). And almost no one talks to him, but because i still get along with him, people started referring me as his 'hou pang you' (in cantonese). It's sad to see someone you thought to be rather a good a person but the everybody else just sees him otherwise. Kinds of puts you in a dilemma.

Went through the usual routine while doing duty and there goes another day. Come to think of it sometimes i rather be else while learning new stuff rather then doing these routine and meaningless shit. It really made me a more lazy and slack person. Cant wait to get out of here and start doing things that actually uses my brain cells. Sheesh!